Newborn Eyes
by Dale Smith
reviewed by Michael Haislip

Newborn Eyes is a self-published nightmare, and I regret every minute spent with this collection of short stories.

The author blows his self-congratulatory load of publication credits in the introduction. The fact that these trite, cliche-ridden stories ever saw the light of day makes me fear for the future of publishing.

The author wields language like a pool cue in a drunken bar fight, stumbling his way through the plots while slurring stilted dialog. Examples of such dialog:

“The only thing I’ve ever done is love you.”

“Then I order you to stop loving me!”

“You’re ordering the one thing not even a dabbler in black magic can accomplish.”

If actual publishers repeatedly reject your collection of short stories, it does not indicate a global publishing conspiracy against you. It means your work probably sucks. Take the hint.

-- MJH 2006